In a development being hailed as “the greatest single step forward ever taken by civilization,” Japan has made a pair of wise-cracking robot arms that make and deploy up to 800 perfect bowls of ramen per day. Yes, we saw one like this back in July, but this is a whole other level. It’s like Wall-E vs. the talking toaster from Red Dwarf (admittedly, a solid robot). These truly awesome robo-arms boil the noodles, add flavoring and broth, then top it off with accoutrements like seaweed bits or pork.
If this is what we have to look forward to after they take over, I… I no longer fear the Robocalypse. → Read More
This dainty-hoofed droid has the gait of an octogenarian jogger, the face of Asimo, and the recovery ability of BigDog. Yeah, that’s not a scary combination.
Check out the video. → Read More
Those of you who follow the Robocalypse tag know that I find the rise of machine-based warfare and biomimetic freakery… troubling. Well, it just got a lot more so. Not content to have robots simply feed on widely available sunlight, or use an versatile diesel engine or something, some robo-pioneers have decided that this new robot should refuel on biomass.
Yes, it can use plants and compost and stuff like that, but let’s be honest. You’re deploying these on a battlefield. These sons of bitches are going to be eating bodies all day long. And you think it’ll stop there? → Read More
“Biomimetic miniature flying platforms” appears to be the theme this week. Just a few days ago we saw a hummingbird robot meant to hover in and out of buildings, and now there’s this ro-bat being put together at North Carolina State University.
Here is my question: were there not enough bats in the world already? → Read More
I’m concerned that before long, every critter out there will be replaced by a biomimetic robot surrogate. With BigDog, LittleDog, mechafish, swifferbot, and the robo-ant already on the march, it won’t be long before the pleasant tweet and buzz of nature is replaced by the noise of servos and tiny guns.
The latest fiend to come out of DARPA human-extinction research money is this Nano Air Vehicle, which flies like a hummingbird, at least for the few seconds it’s managing to stay up at this stage of research. → Read More
Oh god oh god! Household monsters are becoming real! This biomimetic slugbot is meant to pick up dust around the house, but it reminds me more of low-level enemies in NES games than any of its robot helper contemporaries. The Fukitorimushi (“wipe-up bug”) is an autonomous robot like a Roomba, but it moves in a freaky inchworm style. The funny thing is, it would be creepy enough without the microfiber cloth wrapped around it, but with it the thing is absolutely terrifying. → Read More
Most deep-underwater devices are round and inoffensive; why does this one need to be so sinister? In fact, it’s reminiscent of a certain other robot which occupies an antagonistic relationship with mankind. Not sure what I’m talking about? Here’s a hint: “woah.” → Read More
Not terrifying at all! And of course, it’s flown with a modified Xbox 360 controller. How do they expect to get headshots with that? Mouse and keyboard, baby. But I digress. This robocalyptic aerial hunter-killer is 26ft long, goes 117mph, and can carry a payload of 150lb. That means it can carry a sniper rifle and a hugbot. → Read More
I’m kind of glad this cool robo-ant can’t walk very well, because it does everything else with chilling accuracy. Unlike real insects, it isn’t size-limited by its materials and structural makeup, so you could have a king-sized one bite the roof off your house by next week if someone took initiative. → Read More
This fun little video demonstrates how to become an evil, bitter human being and take it out on the world. An interesting alternative to the Terminator-style robocalypse, and possibly worse, since you can’t shoot nanobots. They’d just eat the bullets. → Read More
Don’t you people see what’s happening? They’re taking over! First our pets, then our fashion models (expensive pets essentially), and now… our fish? Well, if you’re planning on replacing the world’s natural organisms with your own silicon creations (as the machines certainly are), then it makes sense to start small. Self-replicating micromachines, solar-powered bugs, and now mechanical fishies are going to be deployed into our waters, possibly to prey on the fleshly fish (and algae). → Read More
With this latest advance in biomimetic weaponry, BigDog will truly be striking fear into the hearts of America’s enemies. When they see his burnished horns bobbing at them out of a background of terror and carnage, they’ll drop their weapons and cower. I think they’ve got a little to work on with the speed of the charge, but that’s just a technical quibble. → Read More
Although you and I don’t enjoy the benefits of pleasure droids and personal guard robots at this time, that doesn’t mean they aren’t deploying them in backwater armed conflicts to test their viability. The robot wars are bearing down upon us like a murderous cybernetic freight train, and we’d do best to acknowledge it and prepare for the consequences. Or at least so says P.W. Singer, whose book Wired for War predicts an explosion in military robotics much like the boom in internet and computer tech in the 90s.
Sweet lord, no! I don’t want to be ground into organic engine oil for hunter-seekers! How long do we have left? → Read More
Get ready for a lot more stories like this, kids. Man, only in Japan would they build a robot designed to love. The experiment gone wrong took place in Kyoto, at a Toshiba robotic research facility. Why Toshiba is experimenting with hugbots is beyond me, but that’s not the issue here (never thought I’d say that). After the robot (Kenji) became very friendly indeed with a doll, it became infatuated with a female intern. One night it blocked the exit and began to hug her with his enormous hydraulic arms. He expressed his sentiment in animal noises. → Read More
Remember BigDog? And its diminutive friend, LittleDog? Here’s a little more footage and testimony from the soldiers at Fort Benning in Alabama. There’s not a lot of new info but it’s nice to see it’s actually in real trials and not sitting in a lab somewhere. I think they’re going to need to do something about that buzzing noise, though. → Read More
The US Government has decided at last that it’s time for Skynet. They’ve tapped IBM to create a supercomputer nearly twenty times as powerful as the current world champion: IBM’s Roadrunner, running at 1.1 petaflops. The computer is to be in charge of making sure that America’s nuclear arsenal is in a working state at all times.
That seems like more of a job for guys with oilcans and geiger counters, but I’ll trust them on this. → Read More
I like the idea of combat robots — not necessarily hunter-killer type robo-soldiers, but more along the lines of support bots like BigDog and these new developments from MIT. The idea, of course, is to reduce not just the number of humans at risk on the field, but to automate dangerous tasks like delivering supplies under fire; after all, the supply line is a weak spot in any army and has been for thousands of years. If we can make it stronger and more reliable, that’s good for everybody but the enemy. What the hell, I’m talking like a general over here. → Read More
It’s true, of course, and not just from a Sci-Fi point of view. With robots doing everything from vacuuming our floors to storing our data to performing surgery, there is a growing need for an international body to establish standards. If, as British robotics professor Noel Sharkey says, “decisions about [robots'] application will be left to the military, industry and busy parents,” we run a risk of enabling very risky behavior among robots, indeed. Who makes the decision of when a surgery is too complicated to be remote-operated? Will robot nannies (don’t laugh, believe me they’re on their way) have a minimum age with which they can interact? How will combat robots be accountable for causing civilian deaths? These are questions which seem fanciful now, but in 10 years you’ll be wondering why we didn’t ask them 10 years ago. → Read More
Force fields aren’t just used to obstruct the TMNT, they are actually being used by scientists to improve research. A new gadget called EnviroStat (“Environment”+”Constant”) can hold individual cells in an electric force field, potentially leading to improvements in drug trials or even biofuel production. EnviroStat was developed by Andreas Schmid and his colleagues Lars Blank and Hendrik Kortmann at the Dortmund University of Technology in Germany. With this gadget, researchers will be able to evaluate the individual cell response to a single variable while other conditions are kept stable. According to Schmid, the new gadget could smooth out some of the complexities involved in cell studies of drugs. Click here to see a video of this thing in action. [Editorial note by Devin: it's only a matter of time before the machines adapt this technology to trap their flesh-based enemies in an electrical bubble. Beware the Robocalypse!] → Read More
San Francisco, CA
