Apple’s Beats Acquisition Is Its First Step To Buying Everything, Says Funny Or Die

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Update: Apple announced the $3 billion deal on May 28th.

Apple’s supposed Beats acquisition had analysts and journalists scrambling to reason out its logic in doing so, as on the surface it isn’t in keeping with their normal M&A strategy. Mostly, people seem to focus on Beats’ ability to convert paid users, negotiate with record labels or produce popular accessories as motivating factors, but comedy site Funny Or Die has another take.

The parody website has created the new video you see above featuring a clownish Tim Cook caricature to ‘explain’ Apple’s reasoning, and in doing so it has rolled up a lot of the more negative criticism of the (still unconfirmed) deal that’s been going around. It’s pretty funny overall, but mostly I’m just a fan of “Karen’s” thousand-yard stare about halfway through.

Guaranteed Apple’s reasoning behind a Beats purchase goes a lot deeper than ‘we have all these billions burning a hole in our pocket,’ but it’s funny to see the armchair analyst crowd’s opinion so neatly summed up.