• The new WinPho7 promo: Doot dee doot

    Thursday, March 18th, 2010

    Biggs is the East Cost Editor of TechCrunch. Biggs has written for the New York Times, InSync, USA Weekend, Popular Mechanics, Popular Science, Money and a number of other outlets on technology and wristwatches. He is the former editor-in-chief of Gizmodo.com and lives in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. You can Tweet him here and G+ him here. Email him directly at... → Learn More

    From: The Windows Phone 7 Team
    To: The Windows Phone 7 Advertising Gnomes

    After months of deliberation, we hereby present the master plan for all modern mobile commercials.

    To acquire:
    Rights to Feist instrumental break
    Cute woman with curly hair (personable)
    Handsome, rugged man in vaguely military but alternative shirt
    Record shop (build)
    Shot-for-shot outdoor location list for all McDonald’s commercials

    Plot:
    1. Woman sends messages
    2. Woman uses “Facebook” (a social networking site. This site is unavailable from internal Microsoft workstations. Use a “public access point” to view it. DO NOT CREATE AN ACCOUNT.)
    3. Woman takes pictures
    4. Woman checks maps
    5. Man looks at woman in a way that suggests the desire for intercourse.

    Repeat this commercial until next Super Bowl or until Apple changes their ad style, whichever comes first.

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