Nintendo president Satoru Iwata is totally not impressed by the iPad, 3D, or HD. In fact, he’s happy running the company in the same conservative way and thinks 3D and HD are fads.

“I have doubts whether people will be wearing glasses to play games at home. How is that going to look to other people?” he said in an AP report.

I’ve been running a 3D PC rig for the past week and I’m glad to say that I’m favorably impressed. Burnout Paradise is gorgeous and Batman looks amazing. However, Nintendo doesn’t do what Nintendo doesn’t want to do, so you’re SOL if you want to see Mario beat up Link in 3D.

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Nintendo, keep doing what you’re doing. Prop up the company on the strength of a franchise that appeals to man-children and keep selling low-cost hardware in a manner that creates artificial shortages. I’m totally willing to spend hundreds more on Super Paper Mario 2: The Quest for Fire, Super Mario Paper Galaxy, Super Mario Bash Brother Olympics and whatever else you’re flogging this season. Also I need more Zelda titles, this time involving goat herding and the dirigibles. Then, when kids are good and tired of your pablum, go out of business.

Oh. And Nintendo’s profits are down due to slow Wii sales.

Nintendo Co. reported Thursday a 192.6 billion yen ($2.1 billion) profit for the nine months through Dec. 31, down from 212.5 billion yen a year earlier.