All I want for Christmas are my two front glands

Monday, December 24th, 2007

Biggs is the editor of TechCrunch Gadgets. Biggs has written for the New York Times, InSync, USA Weekend, Popular Mechanics, Popular Science, Money and a number of other outlets on technology and wristwatches. He is the former editor-in-chief of Gizmodo.com and lives in Bay Ridge, Brooklyn. You can Tweet him here and G+ him here. Email him directly at john@techcrunch.com. → Learn More

08d5_1.JPG

Apparently this little lady found two Wiis and Guitar Hero III and is willing to part with these gems to get a new set of cans. Let’s let her tell you her story:

So I set out 3 weeks ago to find 20 Wii’s and sell them for $500-ish a piece like everyone else is doing to buy myself a Christmas gift, a new set of boobs. You see mine are used, as in milk factory used. We-I am married-have 4 children and I have spent 8 years pregnant and nursing. I have promised myself for 2 years now that THIS YEAR I would get a new pair. But life happens and kids need shoes, hubby needs a new car for business, found out yesterday my truck needs $1600 of repairs and my boobs, well they are just not up there in the top 50 of priorities. Now when I say I am looking help to get this done, I mean it in the innocent sense. No, I am not going to show them to you and no, you can not pick the size. I am just looking to not wear Fort Knox bras anymore, ‘nothing can get in or out’ my hubby says, they are soooo heavily padded with gel and water! In fact, I don’t think it is normal to be jealous of the rocker chick on the front of the Guitar Hero box. I have been staring at her for weeks thinking it just is not fair. I have consider counseling for my issues with her.

The auction is over, sadly and this woman looks like a mannequin. Truly, we are blessed to live in a land where folks want the Wii more than they want the troops to come home.

eBay Auction

Sponsored Ads

blog comments powered by Disqus

Sponsored Ads

Sponsored Ads

Events

Crunchies Awards
January 31, 2012
Davies Symphony Hall
San Francisco CA
Learn MoreBuy Tickets