A new Pokémon just dropped, and it’s literally a chipped teapot of matcha. It is called Poltchageist, and yes, that’s a portmanteau of “poltergeist” and “matcha.” It’s ghost tea.
Yes, Pokémon has already made this joke before, when they introduced Polteageist in the Pokémon Sword and Shield games, which take place in the Britain-inspired Galar region. But of course, the British aren’t the only ones who love tea — the preparation of matcha is a centuries-old cultural ritual in Japan. So, when the upcoming Pokémon Scarlet and Violet DLC takes us to the Japanese-inspired Kitakami region, why wouldn’t we encounter . . . sentient, haunted matcha?
Per Poltchageist’s Pokédex description:
Poltchageist takes up residence in old houses where it is sometimes known to patch up broken objects. Its Ability, Hospitality, allows Poltchageist to restore a small amount of its ally’s HP when it enters a battle. . . . After a target is sprinkled with some of Poltchageist’s powdery body or eats food dusted with it, Poltchageist drains their life-force and absorbs it as energy.
As if life-sucking matcha isn’t creepy enough, the Pokémon Company released a video about the legend of this Pokémon, which is apparently told as a spooky story to local youth.
So, there once was a tea master who was so committed to perfecting the art of the tea ceremony that no one wanted to hang out with him anymore, because he was constantly yelling at everyone about raising their tea bowls too high, or talking while making tea. He then died while saying, “Regret is a bitter sip!” which are some pretty hardcore last words. This grumpy old tea master’s tea caddy was passed down from generation to generation, but then it came back to life as a grass and ghost type Pokémon. It flew away to haunt grumpy tea drinkers, then murdered a woman with its matcha powder for texting at the table?
Now, according to Pokémon lore (which is consistently this bonkers), parents tell their kids in the Kitakami region that if they don’t finish their food, they will face the wrath of Poltchageist.
We’ll have to see what new Pokémon horrors await us in this supposed children’s game when the first part of the Scarlet and Violet DLC, The Teal Mask, comes out on September 13. At least Cramorant is coming back.