1/ Some Personal News

1/ Some personal news …

2/ I will be leaving TechCrunch because I’ve been cast to play a supporting role in “Tweetstorm The Movie 3/ .”

Just kidding. Okay, I am stepping down as co-editor of TechCrunch, but not due to the allure of Hollywood or whatever is going on with Verizon. Instead, I will be fulfilling my completely rational, lifelong dream of going to business school.

After weighing all my iconoclastic mid-life options, I thought getting a Master’s degree could be the most rebellious thing I could possibly do at this stage, so I’m doing it. And probably, simultaneously, working on my own thing like everybody else I know.

It’s been an honor to work here the past five years, and spend the past three leading and growing the TechCrunch team. I feel like I’ve learned a lot more from TechCrunch than it’s learned from me, and for that I will always be grateful.

Thank you all for supporting me and helping me become a better leader, writer and person. I may never have another job I’ll love as much as this one, but I need to click on to the next gallery slide of my life …

However, I’d like to be involved with this fantastic blog as much as Verizon Aol Matthew will let me. I will always be a resource, collaborator and friend to our readers and those in the community who have given me their wisdom and trust but most of all a chance: Especially Mike Arrington, Heather Harde, Eric Eldon, Leena Rao, Susan Lyne, Jay Kirsch, Fara Warner, Susan Hobbs, Kara Swisher, Ned Desmond, Tim Armstrong, Ryan Block, Om Malik, Luke Beatty and my current co-editor Matthew Panzarino.

And speaking of Hollywood, we have a running internal thread here at TC, going on since 2013, on who would play whom in “TechCrunch: The Movie.” You’re not a real TechCruncher unless you’ve seen the thread resurface three times.

Screen Shot 2015-05-20 at 8.04.26 AMThe best thing about this over-200-post-long thread is that it was actually inspired by a listicle written by BuzzFeed’s Matthew Lynley, titled “11 Actors Who Should Star In A Movie About Twitter.” Lynley is now at TechCrunch.

The second-best thing is that I kept promising to write a post about “TechCrunch: The Movie” and never got around to it.

So here goes: Below are our completely non-comprehensive, editorial-heavy picks for actors in “TechCrunch: The Movie.” There are dupes and omissions.

If we, for some reason, didn’t include a good one or you’re a new TechCrunch staffer reading this ten years into the future, please include your suggestions (or yourself) in the comments.

As the future of TC is To Be Continued, there will be many new roles to fill.

Fara Warner Cynthia Nixon
MG Siegler Guy Pearce or Domnhall Gleeson
Matthew Panzarino Mark Ruffalo
Ryan Lawler Rachel McAdams / Jake Galifianakis / Kevin Spacey / Neil Patrick Harris / Peter Sarsgaard and Chris O’Dowd / Mac from Always Sunny in Philadelphia / Nick Cage / Max Woolf
Matt Lynley Ryan Gosling / Ansel Elgort
Romain Dillet Adrian Brody with a beard / Jason Schwartzman with Jean Dujardin’s accent
Jon Shieber Kit Harrington
Henry Pickavet Bruno Mars
Kyle Russell Robert Pattinson
Sarah Buhr Rachel Weisz
Ron Miller Will Farrell
Ingrid Lunden Liz Lemon / Katie Holmes / Queen Latifah / Brooke Shields / Holly Hunter / Chris Noth. Or Herself
Alex Wilhelm 1970s George Carlin / Hayden Christensen
Gene Teare Cate Blanchett
Beardless Ryan Lawler Beardless Brian Cranston
Carol Sebastian Lucy Liu
Keith Teare Paul Hogan
Bryce Durbin Jason Bateman / Charlie Sheen
Steve O’Hear A younger Tim Roth
Matt Burns Taylor Hanson / Bill Hader / Rainn Wilson
Sarah Perez Drew Barrymore / Reese Witherspoon
Mike Butcher Colin Farrell / Bono / Denis Leary
Josh Constine Michael Cera
Natasha Lomas Claire Danes / Toni Collette
Arianna Huffington Meryl Streep
Leslie Hitchcock Emma Watson / Carey Mulligan
Colleen Taylor Amanda Seyfried
Josh Topolsky Steve Buscemi
John Biggs Taylor Hicks / George Clooney / the corpse of John Candy
Drew Olanoff Meatloaf / Bill Hader / David Cross
Darrell Etherington Ryan Hurst from “Remember the Titans” / Rick Moranis
Luke Beatty Luke Perry
Paul Carr Vincent Kartheiser
Josh Constine Ashton Kutcher / Nick Cage
Greg Barto The Wu Tang Clan’s GZA
Mark Zuckerberg Jesse Eisenberg reprises his role
Chris Velazco Justin Timberlake’s backup dancer, as seen to the right of Timberlake in this video.
Sarah Lacy Alexis Bledel
Jon Orlin Bill Murray / John Cusack
Billy Gallagher Frankie Muniz
Heather Harde  Jennifer Garner
Ned Desmond Brian Cranston or Jeremy Irons
Anthony Ha George Takei or Johnny Depp or Linda Hunt 
Susan Hobbs Kristen Wiig
Tim Armstrong Michael Shannon
Jordan Crook Sliding Doors Gwyneth Paltrow / Chelsea Handler / Amy Poehler
Eric Eldon James Franco / Tom Cruise
Kara Swisher Carrie Fisher
Rip Empson Andy Samberg
Jay Kirsch Billy Gallagher
Josh Constine Adam Brody
Frederic Lardinois Fabio
Kim-Mai Cutler Aubrey Plaza
Drew Olanoff Nicholas Cage
Leena Rao Freida Pinto
Elin Blesener Zooey Deschanel
Alexia Tsotsis Rebel Wilson / Anne Hathaway / Lena Dunham
John Biggs George Clooney / Taylor Hicks
Anthony Ha Cillian Murphy / Ken Jeong
Mike Arrington Jason Segel 
Colleen Taylor Emma Stone
Gabe Rivera Cillian Murphy 
Jason Kincaid Cillian Murphy
Greg Kumparak Ryan Gosling obviously
Sarah Lane Scarlett Johansson
Catherine Shu Asian hippie at the end of Mad Men
Andrew Sweeney Patrick Stewart
Nicole Wilke Julia Stiles
Travis Bernard Leonardo DiCaprio