Tosh.0 Takes On Angry Birds, As Do I

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Angry Birds
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While I think modern comedy died with Don Knotts (The Incredible Mr. Limpet was the A Bout de Souffle of talking fish movies), Daniel Tosh is trying to bring a little color back into its cheeks with this odd, if true, look at Angry Birds. View it, please, and return to us here for further information.

I have a problem with Angry Birds.

Think about it: these are self-sacrificing suicide birds throwing themselves wholesale at pigs inside of poorly-constructed structures made of various easily-shattered materials including glass, plywood, and stone. Given the nature of their attacks, I believe a political reconciliation should be – and must be – possible. The loss of life on both sides is, if you are a poor player, unilateral on the part of the birds and the pigs, at worst, suffer limited casualties.

If the pigs were to begin using generally accepted construction practices or the birds began using ammunition instead of suicide bombers, the tide of their endless war could be turned in favor of either party. As it stands, this is mutually assured destruction with the odds tilted towards the pigs and it is clear that some higher authority, perhaps the little monster from Cut the Rope, should step in and moderate a peace deal. If not for the birds living than for the birds yet to be born.