BREAKING: Palm reveals new 'Post' smartphone, still working on Pre

Palm Post
In an unprecedented move, Palm has revealed its heretofore ultra-secret WebOS-based smartphone – the Palm Post – at CTIA 2009.

While the mobile world has been patiently waiting for the Pre since it was first teased back in January, Palm has apparently been hard at work on the (clandestine) Post as well.

According to Palm’s press release:

We’ve put an enormous amount of time, energy, and resources into the development and production of our new flagship device – the Palm Post. Rather than rush our highly anticipated Palm Pre to the market, we thought it was in the best interest of both our customers and our company to perform extended R&D on our new hardware and software.

Not only does this ensure that consumers will receive the highest quality mobile device possible, but by moving our top engineers to a new facility – The Orchid – we’ve been able to do what no other company has been able to achieve until now…we’ve preemptively included all of the features and technologies that our customers (and Sprint) will want come 2011 in the Post! In other words, thanks to the DHARMA Intiative, we no longer have to wait for months of testing and feedback, but instead can rely on the needs and desires consumers will develop in the not too distant future. This enables us to provide the best, most comprehensive smartphones available anywhere on planet Earth.

The Post’s most spectacular features include:

  • 3.5G / 4G / 5G octo-band radios
  • WiFi / WiMax connectivity
  • 21 MP digital camera with 1080p video recording
  • 4.1″ AMOLED / E-ink “reader” dual-mode display
  • Bluetooth 4.0
  • Wireless USB charging/syncing
  • 128GB flash memory
  • Hydrogen-cell battery: 2 weeks talk-time / 2 months standby
  • HD pico projector w/ 5.1 channel surround
  • T10 predictive thought text auto-correction

That’s right folks. You heard it here first. Palm, by utilizing nontraditional means, has developed and will soon release a mobile device – the Post – with features that you didn’t and couldn’t even know that you wanted! The Post is expected to be available online and in Sprint brick-and-mortar stores by April 10 for the fantastically low price of $49.99 w/2yr contract.

In other related news, Palm still plans to release its pending Pre smartphone by April 30 in an effort to beat out iPhone 3.0 / other new Android devices to the market…if anyone still cares in light of this incredible announcement.