Last week, Facebook fired all the humans who used to run its trending news, and replaced them with an algorithm meant to capture the most popular stories the web had to offer — in one to two words that often don’t make any sense out of context. How is that going? Well, so far, trending news has viral-ized a fake story about Megyn Kelly quitting Fox News and endorsing Hillary Clinton, a comedian calling Ann Coulter a sexist slur, and a video of a guy masturbating with a McDonald’s sandwich.
Since the new algorithm-only trending news topics already read like weird, inappropriate haiku, we figured we’d make them into proper, weird, inappropriate haiku. Here are 10 of them, inspired by some of Facebook’s recent trends, which you should share in hopes that it will replace that truly terrible McChicken sandwich video.