Colbert On Defunct Satellite: “UARS All Gonna Die!”

You’ve likely already heard about that defunct six-ton satellite hurtling its way to the Earth’s surface. Unless you’re paranoid, you also know that the chances of this changing anyone’s life, anywhere (save for a few NASA peeps) are very small. Like, microscopic.

Still, it’s been a slow news week and the media has to keep pumping things out — and so begins the emergence of a thousand different news stories on several hunks of space metal that will likely land in an ocean. Rather than feign some notion of severity in this situation, my favorite comedic newscaster Stephen Colbert has weighed in.

While his stats may be a little off (I mean, he’s no Walter Cronkite, and decidedly so), his analysis of the situation is solid: NASA clearly doesn’t know what the bleep it’s talking about.

Have a little giggle at the video below, and try not to fret if you’re one of those people who worries about every possible disaster: there’s only a 1-in-3,200 chance that someone somewhere in the world will be hit.