Video: Nike proves once and for all the world needs a bearded Rooney

We’re about three weeks away from the beginning of the World Cup. You know this because I’ve mentioned it over and over again since 2008. Fancy Adidas this, super-advanced Nike that. And so on. Today’s edition: a three-minute Nike advert that was directed by Alejandro González Iñárritu (of “Babel” fame). Even if you have no idea who these people are—didn’t you read Vanity Fair this month?—I dare you to say, “Lame.” Because if you say “Lame” my heart will break into a million little pieces. Something along those lines.

Thoughts on the video:

1. Drogba scene needs more diving
2. Cannavaro hasn’t made a proper defensive play since the 2006 World Cup (back me up, Juve fans)
3. The world needs a bearded Rooney 24/7
4. I cannot imagine how upset Nike must have been when it found out that Ronaldinho didn’t make the Brazil squard (but he is an alternate in case someone gets injured in training this month)
5. I literally laughed out loud at Gael Garcia Bernal playing Crisitano Ronaldo. And I know the Internet has ruined the word “literally,” but I mean that in its strictest sense: I lol’d.

The question is now: will I take off for the duration of the World Cup? I’ve actually never taken a vacation here, which may explain why I’m pretty much crazy.