The Best Of The Google Voice Public Messages

michael_collinsBy now you may have heard that Google indexed quite a few user’s Google Voice voicemail messages, and these were showing up in search results. Despite earlier speculation, this actually wasn’t an error, Google was doing this on purpose for users who had chosen to share their voicemails somewhere on the web.

Following the hubbub over this, the company has decided to change its policy and not index them, but some of the damage is already done. Here are some of our favorite indexed Google Voice messages. Warning, some of these are not safe for work, and an odd number are seem to be from Christian evangelists.

Message 1: Hey, Michael Collins, go fuck yourself.

I assume this is not about the former IRA intelligence director that Liam Neeson played in a movie of the same name, but you never know.

Message 2: The screaming/laughing girl.

Stacia is either someone on a rollercoaster or someone being chased by a serial killer.

Message 3: Shane FAIL

No, Shane, this probably wouldn’t be good as a private invoice system.

Message 4: Lauren, the drunken male robot mine worker

This sounds like a bad Radiohead song.

Message 5: To the point.

“Shut the hell up, dumbass.”

Message 6: Who wants to call Nick?

This message is a perfect example of why it was bad for Google to index these. Nick’s phone number is available to the entire web!

Message 7: Conversion rates

A Christian man gives a report about his attempts to convert locals in some place to his religion. It seems “the Jesus film” went over really well. (At least 5 of the messages seem to be from this same trip).

Message 8: This is great.

A man speaks fast gibberish to see how Google Voice will translate it. Naturally, if fails, horribly.

Message 9: Tease

With a name like “Kim Sexy,” I would have expected more than a hang-up call.