Dark Army of Pirates Transcribing Harry Potter and J.K. Rowling's Land Rover and Nice House Outside of London, TechCrunch Gets MoM Lawyer-Gram

TorrentFreak is reporting that Harry Potter lovers are currently transcribing the entire Harry Potter photo PDF set, slaving over keyboards like a band of iterate monks illuminating a massive manuscript involving an evil one, a young savior, and the ultimate sacrifice — not the Bible, silly, but the secularist, witchcraft filled Satanism of J.K. Rowling’s unholy scribbling! Sony take note! The resulting text file — about 10 chapters of the Deathly Hallows so far — will then encourage thousands of pre-teen kids to go out and buy eReaders. Maybe a special “Hermoine Discount” at SonyStyle?

In related news, some lawyers sent Michael an email for putting up a picture of the table of contents. This information is super secret and impossible for anyone to find and clearly Michael and Duncan parachuted in over Scholastic Headquarters in Tibet, disabled the security system using Silly-String and robotic ninja spiders, then snuck into the electronically-locked Harry Potter vault, took pictures of the book, taking care to put their shoe and hand in the picture, and then escaped through the ventilation system. The resulting work of malicious malice will definitely put Scholastic out of business in the next 24 hours, even before hordes of prepubescent fans with no real access to computers descend upon bookstores all over the world in what will be the final gasp for the international publishing industry. Bloops!

Harry Potter Fans Transcribe Book from Photos [TorrentFreak]