Vaporware

  • The 2008 Misties: this year's top vaporware

    Wired’s annual top 10 vaporware award list is out, and although it’s not technically called the Misties, it should be. As usual, there aren’t too many surprises, but I think they’ve cheated a little in their inclusions. I’d say that partial delivery of the product (e.g. Home, Android) counts, even if it’s underwhelming. Read More

  • The Far Future: Digital paper on Coke cans?

    We’re not really sure why we’d want this, and we’re definitely not sure it’s technology we can see a use for, but some smartypants are working on a way to embed movable text within digital paper in a disposal medium. That means text messages on a coke can. It doesn’t seem practical to us, but then neither did Bluetooth headsets, so who are we to judge? Read More

  • Look sassy with a patented Apple laser headmounted thing


    Unwired Review dug up an Apple patent for a laser-based head mounted display that will beam video straight into your eyes in sort of a heads-up display that is only visible when data is being transmitted. It’s not particularly novel — or will ever come to market — but let’s just stare at these patent application drawings and wait for our jet packs and space cars to… Read More

  • From the "solving problems that don't exist" files: the hanging printer


    Don’t push me, ’cause I’m close to the edge Some Korean designers designed this hanging printer with a full paper carriage that hangs over your desk and only the print head and roller sit on the desk. It’s not real and no one will ever ship it, but it sure is pretty. Hang on for dear life [Yanko] Read More

  • Optimus not prime for shipping on time

    Art Lebedev Studios was more than happy to take preorders for the Optimus Maximus keyboard (that we all thought would never see the light of day) but seems to have neglected to make the device’s firmware work well enough to justify the high price tag. The method by which the firmware gets upgraded also needs to be overhauled. Alas, she’s been delayed until the end of February. Read More

  • Vaporware 2007: The tech that should have been


    It’s the usual suspects; if you read last year’s list, you won’t be surprised by many of the contenders. And although it’s said every year, I really think we’ll see a lot of these things in 2008. I’m guessing the Optimus Keyboard will see a limited release, XP SP3 will be released now that the Vista rush (such as it was) is over, and even Spore and the… Read More

  • Slacker Portable delayed, delayed again

    Aaaaaaand, I’m done. That’s enough for me, thank you. I give up. First it was the end of summer, then it was mid-December, now it’s the end of January when the Slacker Portable is supposed to ship. I have no faith that it’ll ship on that date. Sorry. I’d been waiting to buy this thing since the moment it was announced. I had custom searches and RSS feeds set up… Read More

  • Exmocare Watch spies on the elderly and mentally deficient, reports on their state of mind

    [Hippy dippy la la la BS about some sort of galvanic watch that watches your vital signs and that will never be released] he U.S. Company Exmocare has developed a novel wristwatch, which is capable of monitoring many physiological signals. The watch can send a report regarding the wearer’s emotional and physiological state to a loved one or caretaker, via email, SMS, or instant messaging. Read More

  • LG patents, will never build in-phone wireless earbuds


    I love patents. The make a company look like they’re on the cutting edge when we all know they’re going to keep doing what they’re doing until someone — Apple, NASA, or whoever — ups the ante. That’s why these earbuds are so funny. Look at the diagram. These things are supposed to pop out of your phone like two little pills. You then stuff them into your… Read More

  • Phantom Entertainment Invading A Hotel Near You, Maybe

    Oh Phantom Entertainment, try as you might to make us think you actually produce hardware, you go and sign with ProGames Network to bring your non-existent wireless lapboard and game service to a hotel near me, you, or anyone. How long have we been waiting for the illusive Phantom game console? Over a year and then you decided to downgrade to a lapboard that was supposed to ship sometime… Read More

  • Spore About To Become Vaporware

    ‘Tis a shame, but it’s nothing new in the software industry. Will Wright’s highly-anticipated Spore has now been postponed yet again and is looking like it’ll never be released to the awaiting world. Electronic Arts, the game’s publisher, says that game has now gone from fiscal year ’08 to fiscal year ’09, essentially meaning that the game has no… Read More

  • iPhone's On eBay = Vaporware

    I’m not quite sure what disgusts me more than the idiots bidding over $10,000 on eBay for an iPhone or the fact that people are this hyped over a phone that will fail and fall short on everything it promises to deliver. Are people so inept and uneducated that they’re willing to pay someone on the interwebs x amount of dollars for a pre-sale that is technically illegal? Pull your… Read More

  • Nokia Shows Off Near Field Communication

    The big boys have been talking about NFC (basically RFID) for years now and it will probably never hit a cellphone near you but PhoneScoop did their due diligence and took a tour of the wonders of “putting your phone next to a picture of your best gal and having it call her.” Why not just put her on speed dial? PhoneScoop via RingNokia Read More

  • Vaporware 2006


    Wired this morning released its annual vaporware list. It features several new entries from the likes of SED TVs, Will Wright, Skype and more. But, of course, what would a vaporware list be without the most vaporized product of all? That’s right, Duke Nukem Forever, the reigning king of vapor, returns for a record five total years in first place. Wired managed this comment from… Read More

  • L Announces Fantasy 8-Core Laptop with SSD, Fairy Dust, and Elven Magic

    Today, the state of the art in laptop power is dual-core, but if that’s not good enough, leapfrog quad-core and head right for 8-way power. That day is today. If, that is, L Computer’s claims are true. The Hollywood Pro X8, announced yesterday, is the company’s most advanced laptop to date, and features a total of eight cores, but it all sounds too good to be possibly… Read More

  • Phantom Slips Yet Again

    Just when things looked like they might be perking up slightly for vapor-friendly Phantom, it went and announced that shipping of its much touted lapboard has been delayed. You’ll remember the lapboard as the one component to emerge from Phantom’s ill-fated gaming system. Biggs actually had the opportunity to check out the lapboard late last month. He seemed cautiously optimistic… Read More

  • Phantom to Show Product Next Week, This Time Wants Your Lap

    via a download-and-play model. Needless to say, I’m fairly skeptical of anything that comes out of this chip shop. So what do we have now? They’re releasing some sort of “lap board” for playing games while you sit on the couch. So, let’s recap: from earth-shattering super console that could cure cancer in puppies and allow you to play Halo IV in the original… Read More

  • Pentax X-Change Concept Camera

    The implementation looks pretty creepy, but the idea here is cool. Pentax is showing off their X-Change concept point and shoot at PhotoKina this year and what they’ve come up with is a small, portable camera with replaceable lenses. The camera has no CCD. Instead, the CCD is built into the lens and is activated when you attach it to the body. This allows for varying focal lengths and… Read More

  • Microsoft Offering Payments for Late Vista, Office

    This doesn’t effect us peons on the front end, but enterprise customers who were planning to purchase – or already purchased – bulk licenses for Vista and Microsoft Office 2007 are getting discounts and sales incentives in order to keep them quiet while Vista runs through its endless development phase. Computer manufacturers and even some businesses were on track to receive… Read More