Brando

  • Disney Princess Web Cam


    First, I doubt this is an officially licensed Disney product. Something tells me Brando doesn’t have that kind of pull. Second, this thing is $52. I’m pretty sure you can buy a cheap webcam and put a mirror next to it for the same price. Third, wouldn’t this look great next to my Beanie Babies? Like totally! I could put Weenie and Tiny on both side of it, like protective lions! Read More

  • $150 Spy pen is probably good enough for "Mission: Impossible"

    Boy, I remember the days of play spy gear in the past. Crappy motion detectors, fingerprint kits that were nothing more than flour and tape, and mirrored sunglasses — never anything like this. And I remember thinking, too, when Ethan Hunt had those camera-glasses in the first “Mission: Impossible,” I scoffed, thinking yeah right, there’s no way. Now, a mere decade… Read More

  • Heated slipper looks downright dangerous

    There are a few areas of concern to point out about this $24 “USB Paw Heating Slipper” from Brando. For starters, you’re sticking both your feet into one giant slipper. What happens if you get an e-mail saying that there’s free bagels in the break room? In your haste to save $2, you could very easily trip and fall down. Read More

  • Sound and vision: The spy monocular and long range sound detector

    I knew when I got to the Neighborhood watch meeting last week, that guy from down on the corner was talking about me again. I saw him outside, standing next to his car. Of course I take security a little more seriously then the rest of the people who just like to *say* that are protecting our neighborhood. Next time though, I’ll be able to hear him. I just bought the new Spy Monocular… Read More

  • Trust issues? This tiny clock has a built-in video camera

    And now to finally get to the bottom of WHO DRANK MY LAST TAB?! This unassuming little clock tells the time and tells you who’s been breaking into your house at night to eat multiple peanut butter, lettuce, and pastrami sandwiches. It’s definitely not you sleepwalking. Read More

  • Affordable 7-inch touchscreen PMP is just aching for a web browser

    Oh Brando, you tickle the collective fancy of internet users everywhere with your $177 touchscreen portable media player. It plays back high-definition video files, it can be hooked up to a TV, it doubles as a digital photo frame, and it’s expandable via microSD cards. Read More

  • Flashlight Speed Holster: Sure, why the hell not?

    This here is called the “Flashlight Speed Holster with Battery Compartment,” brought to you by the good people at Brando. According to the product description, “This Revolutionary Holster allows operators to increase the draw speed of a flashlight!” Read More

  • Speaker with 4.5-inch LCD looks cool, but features are sketchy

    Behold! A small step forward in multimedia speakers! This one has a built-in 4.5-inch LCD screen and it only costs $99. According to the product description, the screen is a “high definition color display.” According to me, that’s dead wrong. But who cares? It’s a screen built into a speaker! Hurray! Read More

  • Brando Hand Grenade USB flash drive

    STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! STAB OUT MY EYES! Read More

  • WiFi detecting cap detects WiFi, deflects funny, attractive people

    In the Old West a man was defined by his hat. Stetson, Ten-Gallon, and Bowler were only three of the myriad hats available to a real man and these hats often stank of pomade and sweat and were frequently infested with lice and caked in a fine crust of dandruff. The Old West totally sucked. Thank God we live in the New West because now, for $14, you can wear a WiFi detecting cap that shows… Read More