Bill Gates

  • Bill Gates Announces $13.37 Billion In Revenue Last Quarter, Urinates Festively Into Diamond Toilet Bowl

    Bill Gates Announces $13.37 Billion In Revenue Last Quarter, Urinates Festively Into Diamond Toilet Bowl

    Everyone’s favorite software company, Micro$oft (note clever use of dollar sign), made $13.37 billion in revenue last quarter, placing it about $50 billion in the current fiscal year. They chalk their good fortune up to strong sales in Windows Server and Vista, XBox 360, and stealing and processing the life energy of third-world babies for off-world energy export. “Our results… Read More

  • Steve and Bill: FIGHT! Actually, they kind of like each other. Just listen to the gentle lilt of Steve’s voice and observe the shy smile on Bill’s face. Imagine being a fly on the wall back in the green room *wavy TV picture and music* “Well, this is it, Bill?” Steve smooths out his turtleneck and rubs off some lint with… Read More

  • Gates vs. Jobs

    I love a good deathmatch and this is maybe the biggest duel to be found amongst us nerds. The video is a few weeks old, but I haven’t seen it posted anywhere, so I imagine many of you haven’t either. Anyway, enjoy. Read More

  • Bill Gates Likes To Lie About Vista

    Bill Gates Likes To Lie About Vista

    Earlier today, Bill Gates went on the Vista offensive saying that the new OS has been “well received.” That’s funny, I could have sworn earlier in the week, CEO Steve Ballmer was flipping out over piracy and slow Vista sales. Gates says PC manufacturers have embraced Vista and it’s currently helping boost sales for companies. True, but what about regular… Read More

  • Bill and Steve's Excellent Adventure

    You remember that party you had a few months ago, where your buddy and his ex-girlfriend both showed up? You know, the ones that don’t ever get along, but they pretended to for your benefit? That’s what May 30 might look like, as Steve Jobs and Bill Gates take the stage together at the Wall Street Journal’s All Things Digital conference. But they won’t be discussing a… Read More

  • CNN Calls Gates Out On Vista's Design

    Sometimes you gotta face the music, Billy boy. You know damn well you copied a lot of features from OS X when designing Vista and now CNN is calling you out. Watch this video to see Gates get called out on his own game and go “no no no” as a rebuttal. But according to Gates, Vista has revolutionary features like support for tablet PCs and parental controls. Parental controls? Wow! Read More

  • Bill Gates on The Daily Show Humping for Vista You don’t need any silly blogger to convince you that Vista is by and far the best Windows operating system yet. No, you need Microsoft’s chairman Bill Gates, who sat down last night with the Daily Show’s John Stewart for quite awhile and discussed the OS, as well as password protection and that pesky… Read More

  • Windows Vista Ultimate Signature Edition

    Windows Vista Ultimate Signature Edition

    So with so many flavors of Windows Vista set to debut, one would think there couldn’t possibly be room for one more. Outlandish as always, Microsoft has dreamed up yet another version of Windows: Windows Vista Ultimate Signature Edition. Yes, for $259, you get a numbered box with a fake Bill Gates signature printed on the front. If you really want a copy, head on over to Amazon for… Read More

  • Scoble, Others, Visit With Bill Gates, Vista Begins to Kick Ass Lots of Vista/Microsoft news today including the addition of IPTV to the XBox Dashboard and the launch of Windows Home Server along with technology like SideShow which adds Media Center functionality to small devices like remote controls. We’re going to try to track down a few hotnesses for you in the next few hours, but it… Read More