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Today In Dystopian War Robots That Will Harvest Us For Our Organs…

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Ready to be exterminated, puny flesh bag? TIDWRTWHUFOO thinks so! Today’s robots will walk all over your heart, face, and stomach and, more importantly, smile while they do it!

First, check out this robot that will polish metal and other materials with human-like motions to ensure the object doesn’t get worn down, broken, or ruined. It’s pretty great for humans because the robots can easily replace us at simple tasks and eventually take all of our jobs, leaving us cold and in the streets!

Once you’re out of a job, however, maybe you’ll have some time to play soccer or dance? Nope! The robots took that over, too. NAO is a simple, humanoid robot by RobotsLab that is popular with researchers. They’ve taught it to do all sorts of exciting things including replace human beings in having fun.

If you’re looking for a robot that will eventually eat you like a banana, look no further than the iStruct. This amazing bot can balance on all fours or rear up to smash you and yours in fits of rage.

And finally we meet a robot that can solve a Rubik’s Cube in 3 seconds, a feat that is now a world record. Why is this important? Because it’s clear that the creators, David Gilday and Mike Dobson, have no regard for human life and are willing to sell our heritage to the robots for pennies because they are enabling these things to best us in feats of geometrical puzzle-solving. For shame, collaborators!