‘The Internship,’ The Only In-Flight Movie You Haven’t Watched Yet Because Jesus It Looks Annoying

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Though it seems to have bagged a licensing agreement with all of the airlines, the last thing you’ll want to watch as you fly home this holiday season is “The Internship.”

Now mind you, I have not actually taken the plunge and seen “The Internship,” despite the fact that I’ve flown at least 50k miles this year and watched “Les Miserables,” “Silver Linings Playbook,” “Amour,” “Papadopoulos & Sons,” “42,” some movie about a gang of dads, some movie about a woman who had to sleep with a certain number of men to find her true love, and “Frances Ha,” which, despite its un-beguiling name, is actually quite good, and more.

Notice as you sit down this Christmas (or whatever you celebrate, even if it is just taking time off) how eerily off-the-table “The Internship” is as a family Netflix choice. “The Way Way Back”? Sure. “Girl Most Likely”? Sure.

“The Internship”? Hmm … let’s watch the trailer … Nope, let’s just go to bed.

Maybe it’s the Macklemore-heavy soundtrack? Maybe it’s the insufferable Asian stereotypes that proliferate throughout, like there was a fire sale at the character canning factory?

Maybe it’s the fact that no one wants to watch 119 minutes of obnoxious tech company perks in 2013? 2006 maybe, but now? Writing about tech economic inequity is the new writing about Apple; bragging about the fancy food in your startup’s cafeteria is just not cool anymore.

And maybe it’s the fact that we’re all a little sick of Google? We’re straight-up main-lining it now. Many of us have to use multiple Google products multiple times a day just to get anything done: Google Calendar is my Lord and Savior.

And it’s no longer just search and Gmail, it’s everything. Wind turbines. Creepy art pieces that stare back at youBarges. RoboDoges … What?

Google’s monopoly over our lives was especially pronounced this year, as 2013 brought revelations that — whether it knew it or not — its internal server traffic was being harvested by the NSA, specifically because that was such a brilliant way for the U.S. government to scoop up massive amounts of our data in one go.

Not the best year for a feel-good film starring the guys from “Wedding Crashers.”