Baby it’s cold outside and, if you’re parents to a young child, you probably currently have no dignity. So why not get some Mommy Mittens? These things look like the rubber and duct tape hand guards the delivery guys around Brooklyn tape to their scooter handlebars to keep themselves warm but they attach to your stroller instead! And they’re “water resistant, insulated and lined with fleece for a cozy experience.”
While the obvious question to ask here is “Why not wear gloves?” I think it’s important to note that parents of young children are often easily confused and bewildered and basically you could tell them that babies need special “mystical toenail clippers” if you want them to get into Yale and they’d buy ten sets. Heck, just think about the whole “Get your boys circumcised” hoax. Doctors and religious authorities have been laughing over that one for centuries now! Luckily, Mommy Mittens cost a mere $30 and come in multiple colors and if you don’t buy them your baby will develop the croup and nobody wants that, right? Good. Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to go change a diaper and grab another glass or three of wine.