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Proposed Law Would Make It *Illegal* For Teens To Buy Red Bull & Other Energy Drinks On Long Island

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Here’s an odd one for your Wednesday morning. The Suffolk County Legislature is now considering a law that would make it illegal for anyone under the age of 19 to buy energy drinks. Plain ol’ energy drinks, mind you, like Red Bull or Monster, would be banned and not just things like Four Loko (which, since it contains alcohol, is already illegal to buy for anyone under the age of 21). Is this a case of looking out for your best interests or a legislature micromanaging people’s lives?

Keep in mind that it’s still just a proposed law right now. You can still walk into your local Seven Eleven after school and grab a Red Bull, kiddo.

The legislation’s sponsor, one Lynne Norwick, said that, “These drinks can potentially be dangerous for teens. Why put foreign things in your body when you don’t know what’s going into them? The drinks are not regulated.”

At this point I could make the good ol’ fashioned “you’re-old’enough-to-join-the-military-but-you’re-not-old-enough-to-buy-a-Red-Bull” argument, but that’s been done to death.

Never mind that, according to the American Beverage Association, the average cup of coffee has more caffeine in it than the typical energy drink. So if we’re banning the drinks because they’re “unsafe” or whatever, well, should we be picketing Starbucks or Dunkin Donuts next?

And how is Red Bull supposed to afford all those fancy Renault engines in its Formula One cars if you ban its drinks? Will someone please think of Sebeastian Vettel and Mark Webber!

Is it really so bad to have a bottle of Club Mate while you’re grinding your way to level 85 in World of Warcraft? (Not that they even sell Club Mate on Long Island, but still.)

But, again, the law is only proposed right now. Let’s reserve out full-on freak out till passage.

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