School’s back in session and the kids are now back at their desks, filling their inkwells and reading their Steele’s Sythetic Speller and Monroe’s Reader. But what about those with consumption or the dropsy who aren’t able to attend and instead are homeschooled by a bachelor college graduate from Connecticut who made his home on the prairie for a bit of adventure and for to find a hearty, apple-cheeked Ohio wife? How will that wee one recreate the thrill of drawing on his slate?

With Bord for iPad, of course! It’s a full-color chalkboard simulator for kids and adults alike. Made by Pixle of Poland, Bord is a universal app that costs 99 cents and features realistic chalk as well as a realistic sponge (Communism brought many things to Poland, but the felt eraser, sadly, was not one of them.) Download it from the app store and you’ll be writing “Adam’s Fall We sinned all” over and over again in a cramped, palsied script on your Bord in no time. Perhaps, if you’re good, your mother will give you a boiled sweet or some extra fat from the can by the window.