Did you know that your USB cable can be used to connect your phone to the Internet and bring over ringtones? I know, right? Amazing! But unless you own pro grade cable, you might as well be carrying your data over in a feces-smeared galvanized bucket scrounged up from a burned-down rendering plant!

Enter this professional grade data cable for $8.99. It’s is just what you need to outperform OEM cables by a factor of whatever percent! Plus it costs $5.99 for shipping, so you’ll pay a slight premium for all that performance. But check out, above, everything it can do! Email! Graphics!

Hurry! Only 5 left in stock! If they run out you can buy this one for 98 cents.