Stupid teens still text and drive because they're stupid

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Despite the fact that you’d have to be a stupid idiot to still text and drive, plenty of teens in the U.S. still text and drive. “By the time [the police] pull you over, the chances are you are going to be done with your text anyway so they can’t exactly prove that you were texting.” Good thinking there, sport.

Those are the words of a 17-year-old Arizona girl, who spoke to Reuters to corroborate her friend’s story that “nobody is going to listen” to laws banning cellphone use in cars. Teens are the key age group when it comes to reducing cellphone-related car accidents, but if they’re going to be so cavalier in their attitude toward the law? Clearly we need tougher punishments if the police catch you texting and driving: you have to sit through an episode of Jersey Shore, including the commercials.

No one will text and drive ever again.

It’s a real problem, of course, this texting and driving nonsense. As mobile phones have become so vital to a person’s (especially a teen’s) life , it becomes harder to pry them away. The temptation may be too great for the average 18-year-old to not check his phone every time it dings. How you go about changing behavior is what the authorities are trying to figure out.

Again, we appeal to your better angels: don’t text and drive. You wouldn’t drink and drive, right, so why should this be any different?