Nobody wants to be the kid who only gets invited to birthday parties because his mom calls up the other mom and asks. Everyone knows that only succeeds in making you even more unpopular.

Our guess is a fair number of the geeky employees at Facebook were exactly that kid. Which is why I’m sort of surprised that they’d think asking people to help out Facebook friends who don’t have a lot of Wall activity, or even many other friends. These people get mocked. Obviously.

We’ve all seen the messages under Suggestions on the Facebook home page. So and so only has two friends on Facebook, suggest friends for him? Others are urged to write on the Wall of unpopular users.

A reader writes to us today with a screenshot:

So, apparently facebook is now suggesting you write on a friend’s wall to “make facebook better for them” or “reconnect with them” if they are not getting many wall posts. It’s nice to know that if I’m a facebook loser my virtual mom will call up the other kids and ask if they’ll come play with me. Because that sure worked in the real world when I was 10.

Who knows what levels Facebook will go to to ensure that your unpopularity turns into a mocking sideshow like the one above? Don’t be that guy. Find some friends and convince them to leave a wall post every week or two.

The last thing you want is to be a Featured Loser.