I must have missed these while perusing SkyMall on my flights last week. Hammacher Schlemmer, which has been improving our quality of life for years with things like the solar-powered flashlight and submarine screen door. Their latest triumph: sandals that are also metal detectors. Actually, I believe only the right sandal has a detector, so you’d best start practicing your wavy walk now.
The embedded metal detector will find things down to two feet below, and lets you know it’s done so by buzzing on your leg and blinking. This little show also attracts women (not guaranteed).
A lot of times with these gizmos, I can see how someone, somewhere, might find it useful. With these, though, it seems unlikely. After all, a real metal detector is moved in a wide arc as you walk, covering perhaps a five-foot-wide swath of beach or ground. This one will cover a thin line about five inches wide. Your chance of discovering something has just been reduced by about 80%.
That said, it only costs $60 and it’ll run for six hours on a battery, so why not? Something tells me, however, that you shouldn’t wade with them. Or wear them around the ladies. Or wear them at all, ever.