Friends, every morning I wake up, look at myself in the mirror, and choke up. Look at me: a 34-year-old man, overweight, exhausted, with acid reflux and sleep apnea. I feel like the underside of a bench at the Greyhound depot. But then see stuff like this. That’s right: that, people, is a Roomba with freaking corners.

Not content with just gliding around aimlessly and making noise, this Roomba will go into corners and tear it up. You’re all like “What could Roomba do to make corner cleaning better?” and I’m all like “BAM!” This is like the Slap-Chop on meth.

RobotStockNews notes that this is simply a patent application and will probably never be made but whatever, right? Look at that thing. It’s like Robot God himself dumped it out of his holy innards.