Updating your iPhone reduces yellow coloration, we are all dying, slowly

6.8 million American adults are morbidly obese

Ars Technica is reporting that by updating your firmware to 5A347 you can reduce that nasty yellow color of your iPhone. In related news, we are at war in Iraq and Afghanistan, there is a presidential election on right now, we could begin bombing Iran in the next month or so, and Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac are receiving government assistance due to a wide-reaching financial panic. We are all currently aging and will die sooner than later. Puppies are cute. Maybe you should call your parents?