Microsoft is totally jealous of Apple

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OMG! Microsoft iz like totally angry at Apple and just sent out a letter where itz all like “We sold nearly 20 million Windows Mobile Smartphones” and it even sent letters to a bunch of analysts saying that and even if it is true WTF right? Like Apple was totally OK wt Microsoft and then we saw them at Dairy Queen and Microsoft was in Intel’s car and Apple was going to get in and Microsoft was all like no getout and we had to drive Apple home and Apple wz almost crying!

And get this: Microsoft was all like in February saying “we’re going to sell more than 20 million” and now itz saying “nearly.” That’s like lying! Totally!

As recently as February, Microsoft said it expected to sell “more than 20 million” Windows Mobile licenses in the current fiscal year, which concludes at the end of this month. In today’s letter, Microsoft’s Andy Lees instead says the company “will sell nearly 20 million Windows Mobile smartphone licenses.”

Is the change from “more than” to “nearly” a meaningful hedge? Some might read it that way. But Microsoft representatives say no.

“We’ve always said our goal has been 20 million, and we’re on track,” said Scott Rockfeld, group product manager in the company’s Mobile Communications Business, when asked about the change. “If it’s short of 20 million, it’s going to be a rounding error.”

Microsoft is such a slut.

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