The Awesome Auger Is So Awesome It's Awesome

Last week, Nick and I were chilling at my crib, watching a little Time-Warner cable when this commercial with Billy Mays came on. He was advertising a product called the Awesome Auger, a groundbreaking (literally) tool that helps break up ground so you can plant flowers easier.

Now at first, this wasn’t looking too hot. You have to attach the Auger to a drill to use it. I don’t have a drill, but hey, might as well keep watching. Nick and I became amazed as we saw ground being torn up with such ease, that we had to have one. Lucky for us, Billy was feeling good today. He also said he’d include the Weed Auger for pulling out weeds, the Ground Auger for my flower-boxes, and the 18-inch Power Extender so I didn’t have to bend down every time I wanted to drill a hole in some dirt.

At this point, this deal was unbelievable. We were offered a special deal of $19.99 + shipping and we’d be proud owners of an Awesome Auger. BUT WAIT! Billy said he’d include something else if we called IMMEDIATELY: The Bonus Power Drill. That’s right. For $20, you can get a power drill plus some shit for your garden, making the Awesome Auger the most awesome deal ever. Nick and I were about to order, when our pizza came. Needless to say, we never got to experience the true power of the Auger.

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